You buy salsa by the quart.
You never take down your outside Christmas lights.
Your favorite restrarant has a chile list instead of a wine list.
You wish you had bought stock in that orange barrel business.
There is a piece of a UFO displayed in your home.
All of your out-of-state friends visit in October.
You have just had your fifth DWI conviction and you still drive.
You can actually hear that Taos hum.
You use the expression, "I'll cross that bridge when they build it."
Your Christmas decorations include a yard of sand and 100 paper bags.
Your car can't clear a speed bump.
Your stereo system costs more than your car.
You stop at a drive-through liquor window on your way home from the bar.
You think that a red light is merely a suggestion.
You think that six tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard.
Your son's back pockets are located behind his knees.
You have to sign a waiver to buy hot coffee at a drive-through window.
Most restaurants in your town have the first name "El" or "Los".
You can't control your vehicle on wet pavement.
Half of the yellow pagess in your town are lawyer listings.
You hated Texans until the Californians moved in.
You remember when Santa Fe wasn't like San Francisco.
You have T-shirts printed up for your family reunion and friends funerals.